What is the funniest joke you've been told that you still think about to this day?

“Yes, that I am,” says the second.

At that point, a woman enters, stands at the other end, and orders a drink. Brian, the bartender says, “Oh, Vicky, it’s going to be a long, tiring night.”

“Now why would you be saying that, Brian?”

Why do I feel so down and not happy anymore? I also feel really tired and non-motivated. Is that normal for someone to feel that way?

“Faith and begorrah. What a small world. So did I. And to what school would you school would you have been going?”

“A lovely little area of the old part of town, McCleary Street.”

“Oh, let me see now. ’Twas 1964, it was.”

How do you handle family members who ask for handouts?

Two blokes are sitting at the end of a bar. One orders a drink. The other one says, “From your voice, I’d guess you’re from Ireland.”

I’m from Dublin, I am.”

“So am I. And from where in Ireland might you be?” says the first.

Why do I feel bad when I see white girls dating black guys, am I racist?

“Mother Mary. And on what street in Dublin did you live?”

“Well, to St. Mary’s, of course.”

“As did I,” the first bloke says, getting very excited. “And what year did you graduate?”

What are the reasons for your political affiliation with the Democratic party? What are some aspects of the party that you support and some that you do not?

The first fellow is now beside himself. “The good Lord must be smiling on us. Imagine that the two of us should be meeting here, having grown up on the same street, gone to the same school, and graduated in the same year.”

“The Murphy twins are drunk again.”